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I am so irresponsible. The day I finally step up and try to buy something for my pleasure, I get scolded at because not only am I allowed to be angry at others, I’m also not allowed to give myself happiness. The only thing I’m ever allowed to do is try and tolerate people, even the people I truly hate with a passion. If there’s one lesson I kept in my heart, it’s that while it’s okay to care for others, people need to make sure they care for themselves. However, whenever I treat myself to something I’d enjoy, it only shows who I truly am inside: a stupid, greedy, selfish bitch.
Well, that’s it! If life doesn’t want me to prepare myself for who I truly want to be, then fine! I’ll just punish myself for the rest of my life. I am already nothing but a waste of space and money to my whole family. How do they even put up with me?! I just wanna disappear and be forgotten by them so they never have to deal with a parasite like me anymore.
Well, that’s it! If life doesn’t want me to prepare myself for who I truly want to be, then fine! I’ll just punish myself for the rest of my life. I am already nothing but a waste of space and money to my whole family. How do they even put up with me?! I just wanna disappear and be forgotten by them so they never have to deal with a parasite like me anymore.
My first instrumental!
https://soundcloud.com/user-909817597/stoic-machine-inst
I finished my first project in FL Studio. I hope you all like it. Constructive criticism is also appreciated.
This piece will be given vocals sooner or later.
Great. I'm getting anxious again.
I'm going on a family vacation to Cape Cod for the first time in several years. I just hope nothing bad happens to our home while we're gone, 'cause our next door neighbor has been behaving a lot worse than she already has.
She's been leaving her stuff in front of our back deck, watching us and listening in on our conversations, moved things on our deck without our permission, and possibly even damaged our Mary Magdalene statue. What's worse is that she sometimes leaves a chair in front of our back deck so she could spy on us, but as long as she's not occupying it, she could be leaving our house vulnerable to burglars.
Thankfully, my mom bo
I had nothing to eat all day
Mom and I were both starving after my appointment, so we went over to the River Edge Diner and see that it’s currently closed for renovations. Then, we decided to get some fast food instead, so we turned around and drove to McDonald’s, and...it took like two seconds for us to realize that the place was in pieces.Now, as shocking as that was, that had to be the funniest thing I’ve ever witnessed this year.
Stress-related(?) Dreams
I've been having similar dreams for three nights in a row this week.
Tuesday night, I dreamt that me and a few friends and relatives were at my grandpa's old house in Leonia, however the living room on the first floor was empty except for a few chairs in front of the TV. Even my old bedroom was decrepit except for a plain mattress that was safe for me to jump on. That was pretty much it.
The next night, I had a dream where I was at a party, but not only did I go to that party by myself, the house itself was full of people I didn't know. I ended up having to play with the only little kid there and I think watched some Pokemon with him. Other
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